I eventually had to give myself some strong CBT and made the following cognitive leap...

1. Books are meant to be read. This is their sole purpose

2. I have either read this book or I clearly have no intention of reading it.

3. I am denying other people a book and I am denying the book it's one single purpose.

4. This book should be set free.

From that point on I was able to give books to people and not ask for them back and to take other books and leave them in railway stations and in public space libraries without a second thought. Books aren't mine, I'm just a temporary custodian of them and that comes with the responsibilities outlined above.

I do still have books, but I do not have a book problem and there were no fires. :o)