It does indeed put the onus on others to behave in the same way and that doesn't always happen. It was this article https://medium.com/p/33e674e83a37 that got me blocked by Ossiana and it was this article https://medium.com/p/79242c5a024a that got me thrown out of the Jgln circles. I don't think I deserved to be blocked by either person - but that is their choice. I don't block anyone unless they prove themselves to be seriously unhinged, I think people can and should say what they like.
However, you will also find people like Elle Beau and SC defending me when some people go off at me for simply existing. Not because we agree, but because we disagree fairly. Elle and I have had fractious comments sections over and over again - but over time that has softened into a grudging respect. I can't make you feel the same way about SC, you've got off to a terrible start, but she is worth listening to. She's a lot more temperamental and less chilled than Elle, but she's also absolutely brutally honest with what she thinks and I like that. I'd rather be honest and blocked and I usually am.
I think there is a problem brewing here on Medium with echo chambers, not just with feminism but with men, with racism, with trans-rights, with pretty much everything. The algorithm is feeding people directly into bunkers, making any article which deviates from their usual fare appear far more threatening than it actually is. Nobody ever died from disagreement, but if you spend enough time on Medium, you'd come to believe they might think they will.
She wrote the words she wrote. I wrote my article as a challenge (and tagged her without telling her) she then clarified her position in my comments and I apologised for misrepresenting her position. Then she wrote her own article, which is there to provide an answer to my question 'can we define the parameters of hate?' - and called various people in to add their opinions. They might be the feminist justice league (lol) but I'm interested in what they have to say.... because a) they might dismiss it entirely or b) they might think about it and provide wider context for their thoughts and I stand to learn something.
My theory is that misogyny and misandry are self-replicating. They fuel each other across the generational divides. Women who are hated will become mothers who hate and bring up sons who will resent women and the cycle begins again. I'm not as caught up on keeping the discussion about men or women - I'd prefer an objective overview.... but every person comes to a discussion with their own agenda and their own style of debate.
