Loved this. I wouldn’t consider myself a feminist anymore as I think the whole thing has gone a bit retrograde and disorganised in recent years– but I will still push for equal rights and equanimity between the sexes in the spheres in which I work.

I think we disagree on the staying at home and caring for the children thing not being feminist, I think it could be. I think the correct push isn’t away from a model that works – the model should be pushing towards society investing in paying parents.

I’m sure there are women who want to stay at home, and plenty of men who would love to do so as well – so I don’t see this as an anti-feminist stance. Raising children is the single most important thing any adult can do and represents the best investment for our species as a whole – we need to stop treating it as an afterthought and presuming a mum can do it naturally. We should be offering training, skills based learning and ongoing career progression in ‘parenting’ - for those whose children have successfully flown the nest. Not just hoping they become foster caters (tho this isn’t a bad thing)

The money we’d save in health, education, social work and law enforcement over a period of a hundred years would hopefully allow us to see that parenting isn’t a default behaviour – it’s a full time job and one of, if not THE most important job in the modern world.

That might meet your shamfem definition, but I’m not a feminist anyway – and there are multiple ways to skin a cat…. As anyone with toddlers and cats will know. Great article. :o)