The problem here is that many imperfect men and women have very complicated views about rape - quite often rooted in feelings based on lived experiences. Many of those people are dominant in the conversation and that is fine - but consider the implications of what this means in practice. What you're asking people to do is spend a disproportionate amount of time resolving immediate therapeutic feelings without honing in on any useful long-term strategies.

Further compounding the problem is that any attempt to take the heat out of discussion in order to find a way forward is seen as evidence that the problem isn't being taken seriously.

Here are a few stories which might add some context to what I'm saying. Here's me a few years ago talking about complexity in a specific case here in the UK. https://medium.com/p/f528e3db67d9

And here's me talking about why the definition of rape is vitally important and we shouldn't get carried away with definition diffusion. https://medium.com/p/33e674e83a37