There are confusing messages coming from feminists and society about how men should be. This is now an addendum to other men telling men how to be. What people need to work on is telling themselves how to be - it doesn’t matter if you hold the door or not, what matters is that you can live with the consequences either way. If I were to hold a door open for a man or a woman and they were to berate me for my idiocy for any reason, I’d politely inform them they were being an unreasonable prick, that my parents and schooling brought me up with manners which extended to the entire human race and they need to examine their own internal psychological triggers as they were coming off a little batshit. It wouldn’t change my behaviour or cause me any angst. I am not nice.