These are good questions... and that's about the structure of how a given group operates. There's a problem with pattern thinking within groups that's already well realised in places like the business community - and it absolutely does happen in these sorts of 'help group' settings as well. Almost any group of people will attempt to negotiate their way to a consensus and move themselves 'off base' in order to do that.

The way to do it, is to ensure that there is a continual outside person coming in - in essence that you change your second in command, or you change your group leader. Once you're 'in the picture' you can lose sight of the picture, even if you're a trained worker. Having an outside eye is invaluable provided there is enough communication and feedback between the group leader and the outside observer.

I think the benefit of a group is basically to be found in a group itself. I don't think it needs to solve issues necessarily, I think it just needs to provide companionship and a safe space.

For me, that's about engaging with people but not necessarily ceding the floor at the first sign of a threat. I think some young members of the trans community in particular are very vulnerable and need to hear an alternate view. One of the best things about being a centre ground writer is you occasionally meet people who are deprogramming from their group identity and exploring their individuality.

And that, to my mind at least, is the key to understanding and moving through the world with a spring in your step and a smile in your soul. There are helpful groups out there, but you must primarily work on yourself by yourself... and ask then answer those difficult questions about who you are. Other people can help with that, but I rarely think the answer is to be found outside of the self - and certainly not diffused through the minds of many other people.